The simple secret of lasting fulfilment: is it too good to be true?

By Dr Tom Das -

I want to share a secret with you. A secret to lasting fulfilment. It’s not really a secret, it’s quite simple really, but I call it a secret because so few people seem to know about it. What I’m talking about is nothing new. It has been spoken of throughout the ages irrespective of creed, culture and geography, admittedly only by a minority of people.

Oh, and it doesn’t cost anything. And no beliefs or special equipment or special skills are required! Interested?

Is there a catch? Kind of.

The secret is to simply see things as they are. What? Huh? Is that it? Yes, just to see things as they are is itself liberating. Which implies that if you feel a sense of existential angst or depression or do not feel whole in yourself you are not seeing things correctly. That’s right. It’s my proposition to you that our psychological suffering is due to us not seeing things correctly, a mis-perception, a mistaken perception if you like.

It’s not that we are not good enough or not skilled enough or not clever enough. It’s that we don’t understand and see things as they actually are. That’s what causes our suffering. It’s like seeing a rope in the dark and mistaking for a snake, and suffering as a result.

Can it really be that simple? And what exactly is this mistaken perception? It is that we take ourselves to be something that we are not. We do not see ourselves as we actually are. When we see ourselves as we actually are, then something magical can happen. I don’t mean something all mystical and woo-woo! I just mean that it feels like magic because effortlessly suffering slips away as the truth of who and what we are (and what we are not) is seen. This has been my own experience and that of many before me. I hope it can be your experience too, if you are interested that is.

As a slight aside, note how this approach is in direct contrast to how most people are trying to fulfil themselves  – namely through hard work, through application of effort, through practice and learning. And whilst all this effort and striving is good and relatively effective on one level, it never quite scratches that insatiable itch of unfulfillment lurking in the undergrowth, ready to strike at a moment’s notice. It can be scary to think that everything you worked for can all be taken away, in an instant, without warning.

What I am sharing is instead of improving yourself or working on yourself, a more effective way is to simply understand yourself. In doing this, and only in doing this, is the root cause of psychological suffering uncovered, exposed, and resolved. Otherwise, whilst improvements can be made to your life, the root cause of suffering remains latent and intact.

So, if you are interested in any of this, please join me on a journey of self-exploration, in which we can learn to know ourselves on a deeper and more fundamental level. We can learn to meet each other, to be present with each other, without judgement, seeing each other as we actually are, and not how we think we or they ought to be. Herein lies the seeds of love and compassion. Rather than judge, we can learn to soften, to loosen, to understand.

While this approach seems so simple, there great potential for transformation here. I have seen it firsthand. It’s amazing how compassion and loving connection naturally arise as our old illusions and false beliefs slip away.

To read more about Tom please click here

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