Whether you have experienced low confidence for most of your life or your confidence has taken a knock due to a certain event or circumstance in your life, there are some very specific ways you can ensure your confidence doesn’t hold you back.
Below are some wonderful techniques that will help you improve your confidence whenever you need it. And the more you practice them, the easier it will become to access the natural confidence that we were all born with.
1. Avoid people that dampen your spirits
You know that feeling when someone leaves the room and you feel drained and down? On the flip side, you know that feeling when someone leaves and you feel happy, positive and more energised? It happens because we are directly affected by the company we keep. If someone is positive they will see the positive things in you, they will uplift you and raise your confidence. The opposite can happen with negative people. If you are lacking in confidence this is especially the case. Some people will belittle you and say comments that can unsettle your sense of self.
So be really mindful of the people/ groups you communicate and spend your time with. It’s not about permanently deleting the more negative friends but until your confidence has got stronger, it might help to place your relationship on hold. Our friends and family can have a big impact. So make sure the impact you are getting is boosting and not sapping you.
2. Be good enough
Did you know that it is impossible to be perfect? There are always different ways of accomplishing a task. If you have reached perfection in an area of your life, I wonder what has happened to the others aspects of your life?
To expect yourself to be perfect puts immense pressure on yourself and your confidence. Being good enough is not about not caring and not doing your best. It’s about recognising that being good enough is enough and is much more enjoyable. Having this viewpoint also opens you up to trying new things which is a great confidence booster.
Did you know that your mind and body respond to each other? If you hold a confident pose, your mind will start to believe you are feeling confident.
So if you are presenting to a group of people, going for that interview or voicing your opinion about something, alter your posture to be confident. Straighten your back, raise your head, put your shoulders back and smile. Holding yourself like this will automatically make you feel confident. Give it a go now!
4. Stop comparing yourself
There’s nothing like comparing yourself to others to reduce your confidence. We see snippets of people’s lives in the playground, on social media and at the coffee shop. We see their smiles, read their stories and instantly compare them with our own lives. We instantly assume they are doing so much better than us.
But I will tell you a truth that changed my life. We are all struggling in life. We all have our difficulties, struggles and inner turmoils to contend with. When you only see the snippet of a moment you have no idea about their reality – only what they choose to share. So do yourself the biggest favour. Stop the comparison!
Visualising yourself being more confident can be extremely powerful. The more often you do it the stronger it becomes.
So if you have an upcoming event that you want to be more confident in, take some time where you won’t be interrupted. Close your eyes and imagine yourself in that event. Watch the future you strong, confident and in control. Watch yourself communicating, how you’re standing and how others are responding to you. Then, in your mind, float into the future you. Really feeling your confidence in your own skin; seeing out of your eyes at how people are positively responding to you; hearing your words, thoughts and any other relevant sound. Embody that confident you. Rehearse being that confident you and eventually it will become the present confident you.
Play with these techniques and work out which is best for the situation you are dealing with. Mix and match – watch your confidence improve and grow.
Giselle Monbiot is a Women’s Confidence Coach working one to one and running workshops to enable positive transformation for her clients. As a therapist for many years, she has learnt that good confidence is the foundation to a happy, healthy and fulfilled life. Giselle leads a busy and enjoyable life raising her three children and dedicating herself to helping people increase their confidence and self esteem. To read more about Giselle click here
What did you think of this post? If you liked it please SHARE the love.